Guns Glo Roses!

Heeey... I'm the Fonz! Whooo Hooo!

Special Additon... ( like I'm Opera... ) from GloZell

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(GloZell at the Book Expo) more videos up loading now... thanks
I was massaging this young lady... and she told me about her book! ( Happy 40th Birthday on Saturday)

"Bones that Float"

Ahhh nice and relaxed... congratulations on all your Peace awards... and the school you both started in Cambodia... It takes a village to raise a child... even if the child is from another village... ThanksHow to follow your sex life... and hormones.. according to the Moon Cycle...

Which title should she use.. The Four Week Moon Cycle... orHormonal Bliss... please leave a comment about which name is better... either here or on Glozell1 videos on You Tube... Thanks

If you heard one black preacher you have heard them all right? Wrong...
Dr. Kenneth T. Whalum, Jr. ... is about as non traditonal as you can get... and it's working
Hip-Hop is not our Enemy

GloZell is going to stay in California...

Phone conversations with my sister and mommy...

GloZell--- Hello

DeOnzell ---- your mom is crazy... she didn't pay the electricity bill... I changed the bulb because I thought something was wrong with it... turns out... she didn't pay the bill and the lights are turned off... I had to take a cold shower... what's wrong with her...

GloZell--- okay ... y'all in the dark?

DeOnzell--- yep she's crazy... I hate your people... I went to cuz house and drunk Valery...
GloZell--- I love Valery she is so funny...

D---- well she insisted on taking me in a back room and painting my toenails! She is crazy shoe wouldn't stop... you know I hate feet and I hate anyone touching my feet!

G--- Oh my goodness you all are going to be the end of me..

D--- I'm not done... she got polish everywhere except my nails... I had red all over my skin
and I couldn't breathe because she was so drunk and her skin was shedding all over me!

G---- ha ha ha... wow... drunk polishing... I would have never thought of that.. okay I am going to call mom now... bye...

D--- Bye I am going to Miami with my church choir... I'll be back tomorrow...
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G--- Mom ... how are doing?
Mom--- oh I'm fine...
G--- how is your treatment going... ( she is being treated for cancer in her left eye)
Mom--- I have one week and three days to go...

G--- um... I don't think the lights are on at the house... so when you get home... the lights won't work..
Mom--- I gave DeOnzell the money today... all she had to do was pay it.... I mean I work... all she had to do was pay it.. she didn't pay it... did you talk to her...

G--- ( okay totatly different story) She is going out of town today... and I don't think she was able to get to the place to pay it..

Mom--- Lawd... dat chile' Lawd... dat chile' all she had to do was pay it... I gave her the money...
you know I asked for a glass of water and she gave me dirty dish water... her own mother

G --- ( yawl see why I live here) Mom why do you keep asking her... you have legs... Dad didn't and she did the same thing so you try to make her be something she is not... De hasn't changed her her life... just get ... your ... own... WATER... AHHHHH... okay... ( breathe)

Mom--- Dirty dish water... and she didn't pay the bill I gave her the money... she's going out of town... thanks for telling me... I didn't know...

Well this is how my life goes....
I can't find my cord... I have a video from yesterday ... I am at the LA Convention Center this week....
Someone asked me to massage a duck... and I met a great couple who the wife wrote a book "Bones that Float"... I will get that video up later on tonight...
thanks...------------------------

GloZell's Ghetto Flash Back...


This is Mr. Ben Romano... he was at the Tonight Show the last time Hillary Clinton was at the show...
We both were early and he kept talking to me about his life... It was just the two of us for about two hours....







so glad to meet other people who came to the line... but someone needed all the attention..



It ended up being a very busy day... lots of people showed up to see Sen. Hillary Clinton...

including a young lady who thought Hillary is Sexy hot...


and two young ladies get into it with one of the rudest young men in line


a lot of people showed up to see Sen. Hillary R. Clinton...

GloZell, Jews, Christians, and Scientologist

Sounds like a joke... a Jew, A Christian , and a Scientology's meet with this Black girl...

Marvin Silbermintz a former Staff writer with the Tonight Show with Jay Leno...

He is so funny! He had my Florida girl Leslie and myself cracking up so hard...
Marvin is so sweet and took so much time to talk to us about his up and coming shows... celebrities, and of course the Tonight Show with Jay Leno...

What was so cool is that Marvin Sibermintz had nothing but kind things to say about me and my blog...
( I can't believe it.. I am so honored.. no writers work harder than the Tonight Show writers and they don't get the all awards and the pats on the back they deserve... I don't know why that is)

I met Marvin his wife and son during the Writer's Strike...
Marvin is Jewish... Marvin is funny ... So that makes Marvin Super Sexy... Thanks Marvin for spending so much time talking... ( mostly off camera)...





Thanks Marvin can't wait to meet with you again...

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GloZell

A Beautiful Christian High school sweetheart couple who had a great Jay Leno story...
Congratulations on you up coming vows... You both are so sweet and I wish that kind of love for myself... thanks for showing me love is alive and well... and having a Jay Leno story.... May God Bless your union always...



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GloZell's Flash Back...

GloZell and the Scientologist

GloZell and the Familly Guy...

Wally Wingert is a voice over actor who does Voices for the animated show " The Family Guy"

Anyone who would dress up in a costume is a bit of a freak... Okay...it's fun! Beam me up Wally!

Glo Wee at the Improv

I got time on stage at the Improv before the show... how nice...
The Improv in Brea was packed at 11 PM Show Saturday Night!

Chris and I in the Green Room... I was his guest and was treated like a QUEEN By the Improv staff....
The Improv and his comic friends gave Chris a cake celebrating 25 years of stand up... I mean... telling jokes... Chris was so funny.. he got such big laughs.... Congratulations Chris...

Wee Man from the show Jacka** and GloZell at the Impov Comedy Club in Brea... I had such a great time ... I was chilling in the Green Room... I was special V. I. P. ... thanks Chris for showing me such a great time and allowing me to kick it with your friends...
Thanks...

Wee wee wee all the way home... Thanks Wee man I have never seen someone who was asked to take so many pictures .. Wee Man was kind a gracious to all of his fans... he kept a smile and has a hot girlfriend with a cool sister (boyfriend) and brother... Stay kind...

LoVe Ya

Hey Glo... So you think you can dance?

I went to an Asian Theater... all the actors were Asian and they did the play in English...
I had the best time ever!

Of course if there are any Celibraites... I will find them...

This is Hawk who I watched on " So You Think You Can Dance" it's hit show on FOX... LoVe him!
This is the beautiful and kind stylist for the show " So You Think You Can Dance"
I kept staring at this young lady... finally I asked " Do you model? Haven't I seen you on TV?
It's Yuri a High Fashion Model and actress... the photo doesn't do her justice... she is stunningly beautiful with a great Spirt... She was shocked that I reconized her... I love me some TV I had a great time... Please Support Asian Theater... it was great!

GloZell at Security Missionary Baptist Church

Security Missionary Baptist Church... Hands of Praise... Praise Dance Team


















To God Be the Glory... Thanks Penny... I'll stick next to you so when you get your mansion in Heaven... I can get your guest house... Deal?AMEN

Glo was thankful for the Redneck

Gee Boo! are you ready for this stupid hiatus... I mean... GE must save money!

See people if there is no show... then GE (the mother of the NBC/Universal/GE companies) don't have to pay anyone to run a show ... plus I am sure the goal is to help screw Jay's ratings so that when the wonderful Conan the Great takes over the rating will go up)

Can't wait for the two week hiatus next month... Yes more money your hard working worker won't make... so kind...

I love the GE jingle..." G E you bring good things to a screeching halt"... wow that's beautiful...
I still love the three companies... but when it comes to what you are doing to The Tonight Show with Jay Leno who is my Boo... you can stick your long lasting, energy efficient light bulb up your Mud Maker!... the sun don't seem to shine much there.

Thanks and God Bless...
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This is what I woke up to find... someone hit my mirror!In line I met Cliff and his wife and daughter...
Cliff and I had a great talk on a rainy day about Sambo... Raiders of the Lost Ark ( I told him I never seen any of Harrison Ford's movies...because Raiders of the Lost Ark advertisement Harrison had a whip.... hmmm white man with a whip... nope not seeing that

Cliff thought that was funny.... I think that Cliff and I could solve the worlds problems if we sat there a little longer... a Red Neck from Texas and Ghetto Black girl from Florida.. got along great! Cliff is awesome... I thought he was a minister... ( His wife laugh very hard at that)

I told Cliff about (Wolfman Max) and how he freaks if someone moves his magazine... he told his daughter to moved it ( she didn't know) and Max was like " Hey... were is my magazine? It's a good thing I keep a spare in the bushes" Max had a extra free magazine in the bushes... not a dumb guy...

Tonight Show Biz...
If you happen to take a sleeping pill and miss the show... good!
It was so bad... that it was funny... I mean... this was the bottom of the barrel... I know Wolfman would be a better guest than Ray Sanders the Turkey Baister Player from Texas! OMG!

Terry Bradshaw is terrible and telling jokes (which I think must be the joke) This time his agent or manager guy wasn't off to the side laughing at everything... Terry looked good again this time... he is crazy and funny...
Ray Sanders... a Slap-a-dee- hot mess! What fools these mortals be! Jay kept looking and Kevin like " WTF" is booking this crap!

Then Terry Ray and Jay and a Turkey Baister and it totally looked Felic... the goal was to blow it with out the warm juice shooting out... Ray" Make sure Jay you put your finger on the sweet spot before you blow" okay...

C. C. ( got to look up spelling) was good a good musical guest... the only thing was it was a slow rainy day... and her song was slow and pretty so I was about to go to sleep...

After the show everyone took off and Max didn't get all the cue cards that he usually collects (nuts) and he was so sad... they had to get everyone out and he was trying to find someone to help... I called to one of the Camera men ( thanks) and got it before I left...

Max was so happy... I mean it's kind of nice that it doesn't take that much to make him happy... You would have thought I gave him money... " Oh thank you... I am going to get you something"... no Max please don't ( no more pies, marshmallows or hot melted chocolate chips unwrapped out of your pocket...)

Max says that Kevin Eubanks and the Tonight Show band will be the perfect choice to back him up on his dog song and his famous'' Natalie Natalie" song...

Max did serve our country in the Navy years ago... so to him and to all our Boys and Girls who are serving and have served our country because we ask them to... Thanks

Be Safe and have a Blessed Memorial Weekend...
( I will be blogging ... Monday-Friday)

Green Bush!

( I will finish soon I have to eat..) It was an okay show...

Good morning Jay Boo!... umm your writers have been off the chain... great job! Everyone has been bringing it... that's so much fun to see and feel...( I'm doing my ghetto part out side... Can I go to your last show?... Wait... I am still holding on to the fact that you will stay... Can I go to your first show in 2010?)


Here is the picture of the syrup that was handed to you during the hand shaking part of the show...

They were sad that you gave it back but I told them that you didn't know if it was a bomb or what, plus people can't just get into the habit of handing you stuff during the show... ( Don't worry I got your back)
These are the sweet guys who wouldn't let Wolfman sit... he laid down and said " I don't F'n Care if that F'n freak thinks he's first" so ... I handled it gently... It't only me out there... Only I can mess with Wolfman... not cool when other people do it... ------------
I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THANKS TO THE HOT GUY FROM THE TODAY SHOW THAT CAME OUT AND SPOKE TO ME... YOU ARE A FINE FINE MAN... I LOVE HOW YOU DRESS, YOUR EYES, YOUR CLOTHES... I HOPE THAT YOU HAVE MORE COMPUTER PROBLEMS SO I CAN SEE YOU AGAIN... YOU MADE A GLOOMY DAY BRIGHT!

The line was eh... the weather was eh... the energy was eh... I decided to just turn on the camera and see what happened... it was okay...

There were three die hard David Cook fans ( David Cook the winner of American Idol) and when you have die hard fans... they are serious not fun... focused and just want to see who they want to see and that's it... they didn't talk to anyone ... both had on earphones... so... they were still better than Clay Akins old raggedy fans!---------( one was very nice in a pink shirt...)

Out side... this guy walked by in a suit... ( Jenna Bush was just at the show...um about two weeks ago and I knew that he was with the Secret Service)

So I said " oh you are with the Secret Service" and he stopped , looked at me and said.. NO"

But he was and I saw him inside... nothing gets passed me duh...

Tonight Show Biz...

Hot T ( Producer) You rocked those F-Me red heels with the pointed to girl Seeexy! How do you walk in those?... and you can walk without making a sound on the stage... such talent!

During Jay's warm up Jay called on the die hard D.C. fan in the white dress who is nuts over David... and begged him to let her meet David Cook... of course Jay said no... and he called her Psycho...

John Melendez... had to really work to pump up the audience... (good job!)
The monologue had some flat moments.. the audience was flat

Jay has a cold... and during the break he is snoting all over the place... blowing his nose... ( I bet I could sale that hanky on Ebay... someone would buy Jay's booglets)

Laura and Jenna Bush... okay... Ebony and Ivory... Jenna who must still be a virgin cuz her honeymoon wasn't even a week at best, wore white with a slight off the shoulders...

Lawdy lawdy.. can someone get Air Force 1 to drop that child off and a hair stylist... she look so plain ... and she is the pretty twin, but goodness.. Get your roots done chile.!.. You being the First Daughter is only going to turn you husband on for a short while... and her hair was parted in the front... yuk!

I liked Jenna's dress and she has shapely gams... but she slouches a little when she sits...

I did find Jenna to be charming... and she called her mom MomZilla... Her and her mom wrote a book... I feel sorry for the ugly unwed twin with no book... I guess she has to write one with her dad... wow... that sucks...

(What is she doing?) Laura had on a black pant suite... it was a little Barack and a little Hillary... Ha boy am I funny!

Laura said the most upsetting thing I have ever heard... most people watch TV for 2 hours a day and only read about 7 minutes... WHAT... people watch TV for only 2 hours! Such dummies! Maybe if people would stop promoting books ( yuk) more TV could be watched...

(Bush has an exit strategy)David Cook stepped on stage... white dress screamed her pretty little head off... David waved at her... ( I was happy for her slightly snobby cute behind) I mean she had a plan and it worked.. you go girl... ( cue the violins)

David's mother, brother, grandma, and dad or uncle was off to the side... nothing funny about their hair... but David's hair is always whack... he is very talented but his hip Charlie Brown comb over doesn't do it for me... but... he is talented and I am glad he won instead of that ( I don't know how to tell my insane father that I like boys smiley face David A. who lost ha ha!)
I go to the Tonight Show every day... scream for Jay for over two years do you think Jay waves at me? No sir re bobby... That's why I have to continue to stalk his skunk haired flat tushy..

( Okay cut the violins...)

Jay got David to give white dress an autograph... do ya think I have a autograph of Jay... Noppy... ( Cue the violins again!)

Okay... Tristan Prettyman was the musical guest... um... don't care... she was good but I will forget her soon and... man I don't know who I was talking about... ( see I was right)

Al and GloZell Green...

Good morning Boo!

So... you have every car known to man... but have you ever.. Segwayed?... ha ha ... I have...
I beat you Car Man! Ha Ha


----
Wow it was a horny day... that's better than mean people who pick at Wolfman day...

I met Al Green's band... they wondered how I knew... cuz white people who smoke don't come out this way... black people who smoke that are on the show... come out here... ( they laughed..) I enjoyed them...

(The token in the band)

I met Pink from Flawrada... and Blue from here... and Richard from Samoa...
I had fun in line...

I ran into Chris Fonseca ( a comedian I saw about 15 years ago..) I always loved comedians... I would go to the clubs and I did a lot of open mic nights... and Chris... I will never forget was so unexpectedly nasty... when you see the video... you know why... he is still the same... I'm going to see him and the Improv this week...

--
Tonight Show Biz...
Gosh... I love the show... I love everything about the show...
okay...

The audienced didn't come up to shake Jay's hand so that he could shake Chris F. hand the comedian I saw about 15 years ago... I said 10 to him until I thought about it... That was so nice Jay... aww at least you knew that Chris is a guy...

John Melendez... perfect... love him...
Jay looked so good... I love him in a dark suite with yellow tie.. he looks the best in that... ( Thanks Jeff King of Celebrity Wardrobe!)

Adam Sandler... had a fux hawk and they didn't talk about that... Adam broke his ankle and expecting another baby...and... wait... I know that bald head...

It's Jeff Zucker...( President of NBC) he looks just like all of his pictures... he dress the same also.. white shirt black pants... but... he's...cute...

Everyone seemed happy to see him... he was laughing at Adam ( he yawned once)
He was with ...hmmm can't be daughter so I guess his child bride... she is tall with awesome legs... and Jewish..( nose gives it away every time)... She hot...

But.. so is he... in a George Costanza sort of way... He is powerful, cocky, confident and a Az hole... man is he sexy...

He went up to Jay and Jay looked surprised to see him... but genuinely happy to see Jeff... and Jeff Zucker has a nice tush, Jay -Z has an apple bottom... I don't blame his Jewish Barbie for nabbing dat...
But Jay-Z isn't the only one who loves Adam Sandler...

Al Green.. I got a couple of winks from the guys I met before the show... they stayed after to ask me if I liked it...

Al had to want to burn up in his Sunday go to meeting church outfit... but... he was good... he did a fast song for the show and a slow jam for NBC.Com... ( it's worth looking at)

The song was like... Lay it down, and fall in love... it was the Shiznit... ( the slow song)
dueing his first song he passed out red roses for da ladies... that's straight up old school.. Al is an Ole'G... These young bucks don't know how to do it.. Al had it going on... OH SNAP!
Al B frik'n Sure... is standing next to me... OMG!

Al B. Sure is the only black man I want... oh gosh! woooo he looks good... I bet he wrote that love song for Al... man...
---
Oh yeah...

Hey... I thought I noticed it yesterday with the Kentucky guy... now I know that your writer team is so good that you make a joke up from the people who you meet during the warm up... I bet it's Young Kevin ( a writer) geez... that is impressive good and awesome Jay cracked on my girls from here and Florida... sisters ( Pink and Blue) with friends...

Jay Leno... I was screaming at you during the warm up... that is a woman... that is a girl... that is a female...
You kept calling this lady a Sir (twice) Gentlemen (three times!) and you guys!
We all were laughing because you kept calling them men! It's cool I talked them after the show...

These are the Two LADIES WHO TOOK A PICTURE WITH YOU BEFORE THE SHOW! Joan and Jackie... sisters also Jay... SISTERS! Today was a fun day
Oh Hillary Duff looked pretty...

NBC is Sexist?... Glo didn't know?

Your word for today is... Sexting... it is when you send sexy text messages... teens are big on doing it... I have to keep you cool and updated! You MILF!
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last night on I had to get gas and I tried to make it all the way to LA where I live... but I was pass E

I went to here Ben Moore UCLA student who is a young missionary from my church talk about his trip to Africa.... we got out late...

So on Crenshaw ( Da hood) I had to get gas ... plenty of nig's just chilling doing nothing that I could tell but just hanging... some kind of gang... plenty of patrol... so I paid and started pumping

I was watching this beetle thing flying... then...zap!
something hit my face.... I flung it off my face... ( la la la)... continue to pump

I looked down and my tank top was moving... ( Oh Zell No)... I look.. a Bee is resting on my bra...

OMG ( that's Oh My Gawd Gidgit) ... I couldn't freak out... there is a bee on Lavern! ( right breast)... it started buzzing. trying to fly.. ( Oh Jesus! Help me not to jump out this tank and get beat down)

I have never seen a bee at night... don't they go to sleep?... I get the only bee that hangs at a ghetto gas station in front of Hoods late night on Crenshaw...

I go in my car.... and undid my bra... but then I could tell that Hood's are looking " What is she doing?" I didn't know if they new I was taking off my bra or... thought I was reaching for a gun...

I wanted to rip off everything but... I couldn't... I couldn't drive cuz if that bee started flying...
I am freaking... I take off cuz they are really looking... and

Cops shoot first ask questions later...

I had to keep the doors lock and windows up...
It flew from under my tank... I started swatting and screaming in my car...A BEE OH LAWD A BEE!

I'm at the light... looking like I'm beating myself... people were looking, some guy was laughing...
got home... and ran out the car... yeah!
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Sen. Ted Kennedy has a Brain Tumor... that's Brain Cancer on the left side... my prayers are with the Kennedy Family...
---------

Okay let's talk...
the line was weird... video will explain more...



I have seen this sister pass by all the time... today I spoke to her



I was trying to take a picture with the motor cop when...
Why did this lady give a cop attitude...



I met nice people who wanted to give Jay...syrup that was shaped like his face...
Tonight Show Biz...

During the shaking hands beginning part of the show... the nice couple handed Jay the syrup but Jay gave it back... ( He couldn't start accepting gifts during the show from the audience... that would start a trend... security didn't even know) If they didn't edit it out they are the last ones that Jay shakes hands with...

The monologue was funny! ( The writers are on fire)
one of the funniest moments was an add lib by Kevin Eubanks... but Jay ignored him... ?

Can you empress Ed Asner... funny this huge man with his boobies hanging out got through a hula hoop! ...

Sylvester Stallone... looks like a claymation form of himself... still cool to see him... he's short and wears lifts... and a hair piece... but still got it.... my Grandfather didn't look like that...

The Ziffs who has been married for 75 years... gosh I was going to puke! Oh the love.. lovely love love... love kept us together... blah blah blah... we have never dated anyone else... (help me Lawdy)... then old man Ziff read this poem he wrote... all the ladies were crying... I mean boo hooing... it was so sweet... ( I was trying to fart or something to break the sugar flying in the air... but alas I couldn't)

But they said they had sex in a airplane more than once... they are old freaks... then I started to cry... that was romantic....

Jason Mraz...

awesome cool... Jamaican feel don't worry be happy song... Jason was great... different fresh new... he had on no shoes... I love the gangsta on the bongos... so random ( all Jason's pictures I found on gaybears.com... under men I'd do... well I guess I am a gay man too...okay)

(Melinda... Vickie wasn't impressed)
After the show... Hillary Supporters was protesting at NBC