Glo Hero

Boyfriend is tripping. We were going to go to Trader Joe's Last night and I had just walked into his place from putting up my blog.

Boyfriend== Well as soon as you take off your badge we can go.

(I made a badge for myself out of a Tonight Show with Jay Leno Sticker a Page gave me. I don't have people I have to advertise myself the best I can. By myself)

GloZell == I'm buy groceries and you can't walk with me because of my badge.

Boyfriend== I don't want to walk with someone who looks like they just came from a convention.

GloZell == Well I walk with and old bald out of shape white guy. So whats the problem? Do you think that people are going to look at us and think "Oh No that White guy is walking with a younger black lady and she is wearing a ghetto Tonight Show with Jay Leno badge! How could he?

Boyfriend== Well You should go now.

GloZell == No. I was going to the Tonight Show with Jay Leno before you and I will go after you if I have to. You can't just tell me to leave when you feel like it after we had plans. Get it together.

Then Boyfriend talked, I pretended to listen. He has so many excuses for why he is not doing what he wants to do in life. That's the problem not me. He blames mother,father, ex, past jobs everything. I can come up with excuses as to why I don't exercise. The bottom line is if there is something you want to do...do it. There are excuses and there are results. I don't exercise...I'm fat. Case closed no one else to blame.

Boyfriend is trying to catch a cricket with his vacuum cleaner. He cracks me up. He will feel better about himself and life once he gets focused. That's what we all have to do. LoVe Ya Boyfriend. I know that you ALWAYS have to hear about the Tonight Show so I should cut you some slack. Thanks for apologizing.I know that is hard for a LEO to do.
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8AM. Morning ticket line I met some guys from Sweden.(Anders,Staffan,Rodger,Peter and playing cards Niklas. )

And from Israel,Ran Rotem and Or Golah
71 year young great grand mother Lucie from Maine who is traveling by herself on vacation.

Nicole who has somthing personal she wanted to tell Jay. She wouldn't tell me but she wants me to set up a meeting so she can tell him something top secret.

I would like to give a shot out to Sarah Layman from Ascent Media who took a picture of me for her class assignment. Thanks Sarah.

Lucie with her teeth in.

At the show today was some service men. They were guest of Producer Bob Long.

Debbie is one of the producers. I can't take pictures inside the studio so I will have to describe her. Debbie is like a cross between a young Sally Fields with the spunk of Mary Tyler Moore. Mrs. Debbie writes the cue cards and guides Jay during the show. She is pretty important. Deb sits on stage right of Jay. Look for her when you come to the show.

On the show today is Denis Leary. He was funny and very opinionated.Robert Klein. Still has it. He cracked us up. and musical guest Spoon. I only found pictures of spoons. They were okay. They needed some more silverware.

Remember, 9-11

LoVe Ya,



GloZell

GloZell's Ghetto Gripe------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am so sick of people in line telling me how normal, regular and down to earth Jay Leno is. There is nothing normal about him. What is normal about him? His Hair? No.If Jay Leno wasn't famous and he was just walking pass you on the sidewalk. You would think to yourself" Hey that man has got a big head". Everyone notices Jay. God knew what he was doing.If Jay was a regular guy and lived next to you, and you noticed that he had a different car every day of the week. You would call the cops!If you worked with a guy who only wore the same outfit everyday for 15 years.(Denim shirt and Jeans) You wouldn't want to sit next to him.It is not normal in Hollyweird to be married to the same person for 27 years.Who is a Feminist.(The beautiful Mavis Leno)

As we think of all of our hero's today. I'm glad that my hero is different than everyone else. Has his own standard, stands out in a crowd, and is one of a kind.GloZell loves Jay Leno! I wouldn't go to every show for over a year if Jay was just an average, regular, down to earth guy. I could go anywhere and see that.

Glo Fishing

Mom calls at 8am

Mommy == Good morning this is your mother Gloria R. Green

GloZell == Good morning. I like those tops you sent. They gather at the top andblossom out.

Mommy == I figured they would fit you. They are maternity wear. If you can't fit them you can send them back because I lost two pounds on Weight Watchers.

GloZell == Thanks. I bought some new hair.

Mommy == Great because nobody famous wears braids. You have to look like a star. Don't get one of those afro looking things your neck is to long. You know how people use to say you looked like Whoopi.

Mommy== Wel,l Jay Leno will get his package from me this week when they get back!
Make sure you look pretty and thin. I thought of a show for you it's called "The Fisherman"

Mommy == At the Carters this Friday. Lassie took two fried brims then put her plate on top of the brim plate so nobody else could get any. That's a show!

GloZell == Let me get this right. You want Jay to do a show about us eating fish every Friday at the Carters.

Mommy == It's great! Another time Aunt Mary the preacher was eating a whole plate of fish and talking about how she hates mullet. She was eating mullet! Ha ha ha. She didn't know it!

Mommy == I tell you it's a hit. Now if you just wrap yourself in plastic wrap and just walk around, you will sweat off pounds.

GloZell == Okay.

Mommy== I am so proud of you. How is Boyfriend?
GloZell == He came over onto my side and then we drove to an great Indian Place for dinner. the food was so good.

Mommy == Well, next time leave somthing on your plate. Take care. Mommy loves ya.

GloZell == Glowie loves ya too.

I then call my sister

GloZell == Hey your mom is... very creative.

DeOnzell == She is just nuts!

GloZell == I think she sent a package to Jay Leno. I think it's has clips of me doing stuff 20 years ago. And I think she sent Crystal Light(The white mans Kool-Aid) I bought a wig but it's too short. I need to get another one. But it will do for now.

DeOnzell == Your neck is too long. How is the hole you live in.

GloZell == Well I flushed the toilet and some came up the shower floor.

DeOnZell == That probably helped the smell in that place. I guess you will get tired and come back to Florida. Nothings going to happen for you in California.

GloZell === Do you remeber that song dad use to sing? "Bellview Bellview you are need to go to Bellview and your momma too. Go to Bellview and I'm not visiting you." I think he might have been talking about mom.

DeOnzell == Duh! I'm not in it. I'm the normal one.

GloZell == You think mom wants to act or somthing? She has never been in a play or even sang in the choir. But one moment on stage with Jay and she has flipped.

DeOnzell == Who cares? She only cares what you do. She dosn't love me at all. "GloZell is doing this, GloZell is doing that".

GloZell == Okay.

DeOnzell == You are doing nothing! Just talking to people at the Tonight Show. That's stupid. I got to go Miss Bellview. I'm taking a nap so don't call me back. (click)


I think I rather be called crazy then just plain MEAN!

Remember, I'ts normal to be a little crazy

LoVe Ya,

GloZell

No Leno for Glo…

I was pretty excited about going to see Jay Leno do stand up tonight. Someone I met in the Tonight Show line last week said that she will pay for the both of us to go see Jay Leno’s stand up act in Hermosa beach. I play piano for my church at 7:30 service so I had to get some one to cover for me. No way was I going to miss this opportunity.

This morning I went walking the whole time, I was thinking "I couldn’t wait to see Jay Leno do standup"! I didn’t know how different it was going to be. If anyone form the Tonight Show worked there. I hadn’t been in a comedy club in a long time. Because of passed horrors. But I was ready to go and enjoy myself.

It would have worked out great because The Tonight Show with Jay Leno is on Hiatus for two weeks. The nice lady called today and said "It’s my day off and I think I’m going to the beach so I will just make arrangements later. I’m good on my word. I’ll get ticket another Sunday.

GloZell == Well I just can’t take off work again. I don’t have that many people who can and are willing to play music for a late service.

Lady == Oh I thought you didn’t work so I figured we will go another time.

GloZell == It’s fine, thanks anyway, take care and enjoy the beach.

Here’s the thing, Im not easy to get angry. So, I’m not angry. I can’t get mad at someone who was doing me a favor or being nice even if they fell through or not. However, I’m not a person who gives second chances.

If this lady come back to the Tonight Show I would be happy to hold a spot for her or anything that I would do for anyone else. No hard feelings. It’s not right to just up and change plans the day of. It would have been more helpful if she had thought of this yesterday.

I called Luis Oliart who is a great guitarist and told him he didn’t have to cover for me if he didn’t want to. Luis has had a rehearsal with a singer and a drummer so he is going to play tonight. I know it will be great.

I just have to get out of this country bumpkin mentality. Nice people go to heaven but they don’t get much on earth seems like.
I just have to spend more time with GloZell. Why do I care so much about Jay Leno? I can’t get mad that he doesn’t give to poots about me. I need to face the music. Sitting at the Tonight Show ain’t doing a cotton picking thing. I still feel like maybe I will have a light bulb moment and think of what to do with myself at the T. Show.

One day I will learn that people will say anything and have no respect for your time. On the other hand, you are allowed to change, you mind about anything you want whenever you want.

I kind of admire the lady because I would have gone on with the plans only because I had said I would. It’s kind of… Gutsy? That she didn’t feel obligated to keep her word because there was something else she rather do. She will get ticket another time.

I just don’t think I would go with her because of today. Whatever. If you want something done, do it. If you want to go somewhere do it y our self. I can’t get mad at her; I would have to get mad at myself first.

When you struggle through college and graduate, when someone has pledge to be with you through sickness and health till death do you part, then divorce you, when your father has passed away, when you need a place to stay in california and the person you ask who you thought was your friend from your hometown says’" I need my space and I have to check with my inner child", when you know you have something great to offer the world and just haven’t been exposed to the right person and time is just ticking away.

When I sit and watch The Tonight Show with Jay Leno looking at people doing what I want to do or be a part of. And most of them don’t even care about their jobs or don’t realize how important they are to the T.S. experience. And your mother is doing her best to help you.

Not too much else can really bother you.

Yesterday at my elders meeting we prayed for someone at the chuch who as AIDS. I was shocked. I didn't know I knew someone who has AIDS. You can't look at them and tell.

What’s a ticket to see Jay Leno? I see Jay everyday! One day he will aske for tickets to see my show. When you put your life in prospective, some things just aren’t that serious.

I hope she has fun at the beach.

Remember, When someone shows himself or herself to you, believe them.

LoVe Ya,

GloZell

GloZell Washington…

7 AM --- I watch the children’s show "Dooley and Pals "on the Christian station #17 on my TV). My ex-husband plays Dr. Arvid a Veterinarian on the show. The show used his real name and he is a real Veterinarian. It’s a great children’s show. It was taped four years ago. I was at some of the tapings. I enjoy the show, I knew everyone. On the show, Dr. Arvid was wearing an outfit that I bought. The shows are all reruns. Great show during an interesting time. He was happy then. That’s nice to see. I hope he is truly Dooley happy now.

8 AM ---I am and Elder at First Christian Church of North Hollywood and we had a meeting today. The second the meeting is over…


Phone rings 11:42 AM

Mommy == This is your mother Gloria R. Green.

GloZell == Hello. This is your daughter GloZell Lyneette Green.

Mommy == Did Jay Leno get the package with the tape of you performing at church and some of the plays you did? ( No) I sent some Crystal Light.

GloZell == Well, nobody said anything (Thank the Lord) so I don’t think they got it and they are off for two weeks.

Mommy == Well, there is always Denzel Washington.

GloZell == What?

Mommy == Call Denzel tell him that your name is GloZell and I bet he will put you in his next movie.

GloZell == I don’t think that…

Mommy == Why every time I think of something, you shoot it down, I’m trying to help you honey! I am doing what I want to do. So, you should take advice from me. I finished college, got married and had you and DeOnzell. Listen to your mother I will never tell you wrong.

GloZell (blah, blah… oh yes and blah)

Mommy == I just don’t know what happen to you. You have always been some kind of a dreamer. I just want the best for you. I was married for almost 30 years and your father never left me.

GloZell == (Dad couldn’t, because he had both of his legs amputated, let us not forget that part)

GloZell == No mein ho rang gay keeoh, no mein ho rang gay keeoh…

Mommy == What are you saying?

GloZell == I’m saying what this Buddhist chant that Tina Turner said right after she beat the living snot out of Ike Turner in the movie "What’s Love Got to do with It". (If it worked for Tina, it will work for me.)

Mommy == Just call Denzel, Jay Leno has issues and doesn’t know how talented you are. Plus Jay might not care. Denzel has to care! Its no coincidence that your names are so alike. That’s God!

GloZell == (I guess you think I just have Denzel Washington’s number? I might as well call Oprah! I guess you will send them some Kool-aide and bypass agents and auditions and all the things that people in Hollywood have been doing for centuries to get into movies. I’ll just call Denzel)

GloZell == I don’t know why I didn’t think of that.

Mommy == I’m the brains of this operation. All of the stars have their parents as their managers.

GloZell == That’s right, and it’s going so well for them. (Brittany Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Usher).

Mommy == The Bible says’ Honor thy MOTHER and thy father so thy days may be long!

GloZell == (Dear Lord, feel free to take a few years away from me.) Yes mother. I will talk to you later.

Mommy == Bye baby, mother loves ya and want you to remember your home training. Don’t forget what I have always told you. "Keep your dress down and your draws up!" Mommy didn’t raise a whore. God bless you baby.


GloZell == Thanks, Love ya also. Bye bye. (I feel sorry for those people who don’t have the support of their parents)


Remember; find a place to escape reality (sometimes)

LoVe Ya,

GloZell

Just Laugh and Glo…

(GloZell’s mother calls)

Mommy == Guess what!

GloZell == What?

Mommy == You know Ms. Harris from my Tuesday prayer group?

GloZell == No, I know Ms. Harris from your Tuesday card playing group.

Mommy == We pray sometimes. Guess what! (What)

Mommy == You know how she always wears that flower in her hair?

GloZell == Yes, she has been wearing it longer than I’ve been alive.

Mommy == She Always wears it on the right side.

GloZell == Okay.

Mommy == She has been wearing it on the LEFT side for two weeks now.

GloZell == …oh…kay?

Mommy == (whispering) she’s gay.

GloZell == Ms. Harris is 80 years old!

Mommy == She was so close to Heaven…mmm.mmm.mmm.

GloZell == You think she is coming out of the closet, by putting a flower in her hair on the left side?

Mommy == She is a pack rat, it probably took her 50 years to find the closet. We still prayed for you.

GloZell == Now you have gay gambling grannies praying that I get on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Cool.

Mommy == I sent Jay the package with a tape of you singing and entertaining the seniors, oh, he is going to love it. Jay will probably have you on all the time. I also wrote a note saying please but my daughter on the show. I also put your phone number, so make sure you pay the bill. Let me know when Jay calls.

GloZell ==WHAT! YOU WHAT! How did you get the address?

Mommy == Don’t you worry about that.

GloZell == Did you send the tape to The Tonight Show or…(Oh Lord) to… Jay Leno’s house.

Mommy == I don’t know, someone should get it by Friday!

GloZell == (Oh for the love of …This can’t be happening…I think I’m going to die, at least by Friday) Did you put Crystal Light in the package? (Please say no…please)

Mommy == Oh yes. Crystal Light is white people’s Kool-Aide. Trust me, Jay will love it.
GloZell (Serenity now!)
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In line today I met Ashley and Annie and their parents. They love today’s musical group Hot Hot Heat! They decided to make t-shirts.


Guest: Jules Sylvester with reptiles was great. Marjorie Johnson at the X-Games worked. Everyone loves to see snakes and Marjorie.

Also enjoying the show was Annette, Ed Earl, Brian and Kim from, Roanoke Virginia.


Guest: Seth Rogen from the movie "Knocked Up" and "Superbad". Seth was very funny. (Wasn’t he already on the show this week except you called him Jonah Hill?)

I had the pleasure of meeting Mr. Orval Selders who worked for GM designing cars. He is a friend of the mighty Jay Leno. When ever Orval wants to go to the show, he just picks up the phone and calls Jay. Orval is a very nice and sexy man. See ya on the road Orval.


Before one of the segemnts, Richard Gere look-a-like camera man warns the four black people in the front row that he is going to back up with the camera. I just laughed. (He didn't warn me before I got hit twice with his camera on Monday)

Ashley and Jake came to the show last week, and are back for more, before they move to Iowa. Safe Travels.


I didn't give the Tonight Show with Jay Leno permission to go on a break for TWO WEEKS! What am I going to do. Orval said that next week is the Pebbles Beach Car show. That's for only one week Jay!(It would be a great time to get a life GloZell)

Steve, Mary (Virginia), Tom (who loves a good cigar) and Maggie from Massachusetts loved the show!


Inside the show I sat next to the Benders who are the proud parents of the Oscar winner Lon Bender (Sound Design) they are friends with John Melendez! Their grandkids and John’s daughter are in the same acting class. Next show the kids are doing, is Annie! John is great and knows great people. Be on the look out for Lon’s next movie "The Bucket List" staring Morgan Freeman and Jack Nickelson.

During the monologue, this well dressed guy in a wheelchair (Doug Carroll) had a very loud and unique laugh. So much so, that everyone commented on it, on the air! Jay had to stop his monologue to address him. It was so funny! Doug was with Victoria and Barbara they traveled from San Luis Obispo.


Musical Guest: Hot Hot Heat was interesting. The lead guy looked like Barbara Strisand, the poofy years. (Sorry about the spelling) Annie and Ashley loved them! That’s all that counts. They were the only people in line who had even heard of them.


Remember, Laugh out loud!

LoVe Ya,

GloZell

GloZell’s Headache…

8 AM Line Wolfman, who wrote a one song musical "Natalie" Wolfie also brought his Chinese Theater hand prints and sung his one hit song "Natalie" for everyone.


In the studio when I stood up for the show, I hit my head on the jimmy Camera. (No problem, a couple of guys on the side saw it. (Don’t worry I’m not suing!) Then when the Jimmy moves over the audience it hit me in the head and the guy behind me. (Okay still not suing.) The camera guy was so apologetic the first time the second he felt so bad.

I’m fine, I just thought it would be funny if you teased him about it. (Not Hank but the one who looks like Richard Gere’s fraternal brother. I don’t want him to get upset, just teas him a little. I like him! So I don’t want him mad at me, thinking that I told so he would get in trouble. PLEASE! I just froze because hitting my head twice was a fluke. I’m fine; he apologized more than enough. So I don’t want him in trouble just Joke with him.

In line at 11AM. I sat next to the Kvamme sisters from Washington. (Carol, Ione and Amelia) Carol collected the seeds from NBC’s flowerbed and she will have a beautiful garden next year.


Guest: Michelle Pfeifer was beautiful blah blah blah. Some guy who was from her camp was standing next to me watching her interview.

Dear Sir with Michelle Pfeifer,
I hope you enjoyed that last piece of gum in the Nation.
You smacked the devil out of it; I didn’t hear a thing she said!
Thank you!

We need to get rid of the ants on the cement outside. People are getting bit. (Only white people…they are Black Panther Ants)


Wolfman (Matt Daniels who also goes by Max) sang his song "Natalie again, and again. Then he went to his car and came back with…Natalieland the Puppet Show.


Jonah Hill from "knocked Up" and "Superbad" was funny. He talked about how he doesn’t have a girl friend and that OJ Simpson was in the same club as he and OJ took the girl that he was talking to. Well Jonah OJ might kill people but he doesn’t have a Jew Fro!

Other people who enjoyed Max at his 8 Am and 11 PM Showing of Natalie. (Joshua Duckett, Kara Mclendon, Chris Mclendon form Raleigh N.C. Kristin Thiessen (Bakersfield CA) Sine Menzel from Germany.


Dear Ross (the producer)
I was wondering if I could see
Your horse that you ride in on everyday?
I mean, that is why you love those Cowboy boots?
(I know you love me)

The musical guest Mims. I hope someone tells the rappers that the Tonight Show with Jay Leno audience will 1. Not wave their hands in the air (because they don’t care) 2. The audience has never heard of them. 3. The audience will not even pretend to enjoy their music.


I did however write down all the words to Mims song. "What?…Like Dis… What?… Gimmie Dat…What?..Like What? Your lyrics are beautiful. What does Mims mean Pigmy Rappers? The Jewish guy was taller.

I’m glad boyfriend is back safe and sound!

My sister mailed me a b-day gift...It's a Napoleon Dynamite Talking Keychain!

Remember, Mike the stage manager when you pull your hair back…you complete me

LoVe Ya,

GloZell

GloZell Light…

Saturday Morning (8-4-07) at a decent time 8 AM

(GloZell picks up the phone)
Mommy == This is your mother Gloria R. Green.

GloZell == Do I have another mother?

Mommy == No, Why?

GloZell == Because you always say your name, and that you are my mother, you have been doing that ever since I went off to college. (University of Florida! Go Gators!)

Mommy == Did you get Jay Leno’s address? I have a package for him.


GloZell == Okay, I give, what are you sending him? Some Crystal Light?

Mommy == And a tape with you singing the National Anthem at an Orlando Magic Game and some clips of some plays that you were in.

GloZell == What! (Calm down GloZell Jay will never even see the package, he has other things to do, plus he has people to go through his mail) Oh that’s great mom I’m sure he will book me for sure off a tape done in 1990 something when Shaq still played in Orlando, you think of everything. (Ha, ha, just play along GloZell)


GloZell == I went to an Afro Cuban function with Monica last night. It was fun listening to the band and watching the people dance. I sat next to two guys who live in a retirement home in Long beach. One of them is from Kafenberg Austria where Arnold is from. Today I’m eating sushi with Fightn’ mad Mary.


Mommy == Tell Mary I said hi. Afro Cubans? Are there any regular black people in California?

GloZell == Nothing is regular in California.


Mommy == What kind of name is Leno?

GloZell == It’s Italian.

Mommy == What! Oh no, I didn’t know that man was Italian! Oh help my child Jesus! Jesus! Jesus, Jesus!

GloZell == What’s the problem?

Mommy == What’s the problem? Italians don’t play! You are up there messing with those people and they are ITALIAN!


GloZell == Do you think that Jay is the Godfather of the highly exclusive Tonight Show Mafia?

Mommy == You don’t think anything is serious do you GloZell Lyneette Green? I’m going to get my prayer team to pray for your safety! In the name!

GloZell == What prayer team?

Mommy == On Tuesdays, at the senior center. I go every Tuesday.

GloZell == You go to play cards! I don’t need a group of gambling grannies to pray for me before they cut the deck. Thanks.

Mommy == Well, we are going to do it anyway! And I know by the power and the money invested in you, the Crystal Light is going to work! Just get me the address, Miss Honey. I will show you how it’s done. Remember I am still your mother.


GloZell == Yes mommy. (Mommy Dearest... No Jay Leno!...No Jay Leno!)


Remember, I believe in Crystal Light cause mom believe in me… or else.

LoVe Ya,

GloZell