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Saturday, March 24, 2007

Why GloZell is dating a white man… Part 1

Since moving to California, I have met some interesting black men. None as great as my father the late Dr. Ozell Green, or my uncles on the Robinson side.

I met a guy named Bruce. He was 48 years old. Nice looking black man. Bruce was wearing a striped suite (peach and cream) with matching striped shoes, socks, hat and handkerchief. (I should have run away then, but I figured he could change) He was so nice even though he looked like an Ice Cream Pimp.

I was a teacher at Bryman Collage at the time. Bruce told me he was retired. Retired? I said, you are so young. Bruce said he was a retired architect. I said, My Rich Uncle Richard Robinson is an architect in Florida. He went on to say that he didn’t have any kids, and that he lived in a two story house that he designed. I was so impressed. My Uncle Richard lives in a house that he designed. It was meant to be!

Days later we were on the phone and I asked him what kind of places has he designed? Bruce said he designed the Burger Kings, with the two drive up windows. Before him their was only one. I thought that’s right, I said, I remember when there was only one window and you had to pay and get your food from the same window. Wow, Bruce you made life better for the fast food world. (Yep, I was that gullible)

Later on, he slipped and said I have a long day at work tomorrow. Tomorrow? I thought you were retired? He said, Oh yes, but I drive trucks to keep myself busy.

Then he started asking me questions about myself when I heard him cover up the phone and say Momma get out of here! Yes, I’m talking to a girl, just go! Okay… okay, put the chicken on the dresser, of course I want hot sauce!

I said, wait a minute you live with your mother? He said, she is handicapped and lives with me. I take care of her, because she is a quadriplegic. Oh really? I thought to myself, maybe she was in a wheelchair with some kind of holder on it because she brought up a plate of chicken, up stairs. I tried to justify all of that.

Bruce said that he wants me to come over this weekend, because his mother and sister won’t be home. I said, Your sister lives there also? Bruce explained that he takes care of her also because she has kids, and no man. I asked, Where are they going? He said, they are going on a camping retreat with the church.

I said, but your mother is a quadriplegic. Bruce said, well it comes and it goes. I couldn’t justify that one.

Bruce was no Denzel Washington, Will Smith, Jamie Foxx, Morris Chestnut, Terrence Howard, or Sidney Poitier. I think those are the only ones Oprah likes also.

He definitely wasn’t a Robinson.

Tune in next time when I talk about the guy I met named Shaqkobe (I can’t make this stuff up.)


Remember, Black is beautiful…


LoVe ya,

GloZell

1 comment:

Fightin' Mad Mary said...

I hope you make this a regular Saturday feature! VERY FUNNY STUFF!