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Sunday, September 23, 2007

GloZell...The Homless man is a Preacher?


Friday I was sitting next to Jim and his daughter Stephanie from Illinois.

The homeless guy who had been asleep and stretched out in the line, woke up and was passing by...then he stopped noticed Jim's hat that had OU on it.

Homeless guy=HG

HG --- Hey I was born in Oklahoma. My father was the third Governor of Oklahoma

Jim-(Nods his head)

HG----You know the world works in threes.

GloZell( I start listening because his was well spoken. )

HG--- I was saved at ORU. Oral Roberts University

GloZell---(wow)

HG-- I was saved at the age of 8. Angelina Jolie went threw a lot in her life...she was raised in Beverly Hills.

HG-- I Know that James Garner is from Oklahoma and Tom Cruise was from Jersey.

HG--- I was saved at 8 years old in front of ORU. You know the similarity to Genius and Jesus!

GloZell (Hmm have I just discarded this man because he is homeless, he seems to be interesting)

HG-- I'm a street preacher!

GloZell--(what preach it man)

HG-- The world is lost (Amen) And They need the Holy Ghost!(Alright preach it) I am the Holy

Ghost (Yes...wait...What did he say?)

HG--- I have saved The Harlem Globetrotters! I have saved the Harlem Globetrotters.

Jim ,Stephanie and I look at each other trying not to laugh and not sure what to do or how long is he going to preach.

HG just stopped and went back to the end of the line where he went back to sleep.

Guest: Hugh Laurie from the show House. He was charming and good looking and it looks like he wears a hair piece. he is still hot.

Sherri Shepherd from "The View". Sherri said that she didn't know that the world was flat when she was asked that by Whoopie on the show "The View".
Let me break it down for you.

Whoppie---Hey Sherri I'm going to be the smart black person on the show.

Sherri-- Well, what is great about the show is that we all can give...(cut off)

Whoppie--Listen...Do you want to keep your job. Aren't' you a single mother?

Sherri---Yes but I don't know (Cut off)

Whoppie---Shut up! Look we are lucky that there is one black person on this show, but since there is two, you had better listen to me or else. Barbara Walters and I go way back.

Whoopi---Who has won a Oscar!

Sherri--You

Whoopi-- Who has no eyebrows but nobody says anything

Sherri-- You

Whoopi--Okay then. I'm going to ask you a easy question and you better not answer right. From then on if you want to be right you can, but no one is going to listen to you because they will all think that you are dumb. I will look good and you keep your job...got it.

Sherri--Yes... Whoopi.

So on the show Whoopie gave the signal and asked "Sherri is the world flat?"

Sherri--(On national Television) I don't know.

Whoopi (just to rub it in) Sherri "You don't know if the world is flat?"

Sherri-- I never thought about it, I need to feed my child and we can go to the library.

And that my friends is what really went down. How could somebody that was picked for The View be that dumb?

With Elizabeth pregnant and Barbara gone most of the time, adding Whoopi and Sherri makes Joy the thinnest one on the show!

Editors was the musical guest.

I got a call from Mary from England I met her last year in line . Mary and her husband Vic go to the show every year. They came two weeks ago and asked what does John Melendez do? Mary from England called me Friday morning and said that ever since she asked me that, John has been doing more on the show. I will now answer the question that I get asked all of the time.

WHAT DOES JOHN MELENDEZ DO?
John is there because if wouldn't seem right for Jay Leno to have a black male sidekick. Who else have you seen have more than one side kick? Kevin Eubanks doesn't cut it! Kevin directs the Tonight Show Band 8 songs, plays the guitar (while high) and interrupts a perfectly good monologue.

John sits...raises a cup...

However, if Kevin did the same skits John does from time to time, Black People would protest! Kevin would look stupid. You need a white guy!

John is there so black people can't say that Kevin is a Uncle Tom yes sir that sho issa funny mister Jay I will just play my guitar and laugh even though I might not be paying attention guy.
John is the fall guy. Now do you understand. John is cool by me.


I shouldn't even say a thing because Kevin Eubanks is the closest thing NBC has to a black Comedy show...NBC = No Black Comedies.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------GLOZELL'S GHETTO GOSSIP



Denise Richards is mad at Charlie Sheen for watching adult films. Hey Denise he was known for that before you married him. How about we keep on dwelling on the fact that you took you best friend (Heather Locklear) husband you nasty tart! That's not the worst. Heather Locklear was so out of her mind she was forced into the arms of David Spade. How do you sleep at night!
Have you seen OJ's stupid girlfriend. Her name is Christine and OJ met her 12 years ago when she was a 19 year old cocktail waitress! Hello Stupid Christine OJ met Nicole Brown when she was a 19 year old cocktail waitress. The Knifing is on the wall. Don't say I didn't tell you.
I want to know what fools are giving Brittany Spears a reality show! The only reason she said yes was because she heard random drug testing...She thought it was testing random drugs! God Bless her.
Is J-Lo pregnant? I hope the child totally looks like her!
I have been watching Rock of Love the dating reality show with Bret Michaels...Then I remembered that he was on the reality show Surreal Life...then I remembered that HE IS MARRIED! I haven't seen a thing on the fact he is divorced or separated! If anyone knows if Brett is Married or not let me know... if he is then he is worst that Fava Flav. Say it ain't so.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ahaahaa! You just HAD to use that picture of Kev again. I tend to like his quips on the show bc well, I like looking at the guy. haha I just wish the brotha would learn a new song! I just visited his website and saw that he posts answers to emails on there. Some funny stuff!! Someone asked if he was a cripple bc he sits on his a#$ so much on the show. LOL I am going to write and ask if he's fallen into laziness. What is with the redundant songs?

I was looking foward to your insight into Sherri's appearance but you didn't mention it! C'mon, GloZell, that girl was mad funny! LOL@ a red teddy from the dollar store and an apple!!! Since you were there, was Vicki laughing and smacking her bongos to make Sherri say "Bang them bongos, girl!" after she mentioned her teddy? Jay seemed to really dig her!

Forgot to mention that I like your shorter hairstyle. It looks great on you! I almost didn't think you were the same person from the earlier photos with the braids.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I keep forgetting about the Harlem Globetrotters when I try to tell that story! Thanks for reminding me! I can't believe I didn't burst out laughing when I looked at your face trying so hard not to smile...good times...

GloZell said...

That is funny about Kevin...Cripple! Ha ha ha! Yes Vicky did laugh very hard.

Sherri was so funny. Wow I'm glad you watch the show often!

I'm going to change my hairstyle every month. I know I'm going to get a lot of I like the old style better.

But I have to force myself to change up!

Please ask about the redundant songs... I think it's because they have to pay the rights on them and NBC is cheap.

GloZell

GloZell said...

Stephanie how can you forget the Globetrotters! He saved them.

It was so great meeting you and your father. I know everytime he weears that hat he will tell the story of the smelly homeless man and the Tonight Show with Jay Leno and GloZell who got pictures!